No one told me about the poop!

So as a little girl, when I would dream of being a mom, my thoughts would go to playing tea parties, dress up, reading books, and going for walks with my kids. Now, yes that is a PART of motherhood. A part that I love!

But.....it's not the only part.....

The part that people DON'T tell you about is the POOP! Yep, I said it, POOP!

So, my first time alone with both girls. Justin's parents were over visiting us. When they left, I was alone with the girls while waiting for my friend Esther to come over in about an hour. Addie was in her bed (not napping of course, but having her "down time"). I can handle this, right?

So I'm nursing Brynn, and I hear from Addie's room "Mommy, I have to go poo-poo"! Now mind you, my daughter is VERY smart and has already figured out how to get out of bed when she's supposed to be sleeping. The usual, I need water, I need to go potty, I need my binky, I need my baby doll, etc... Well I had already gone up there about 30 minutes before when she yelled this very phrase "I need to go poo poo" and taken her. AND, she went!

So when she started to yell this again, I figured it was another stall tactic, so I ignored her....

BIG MISTAKE!

I look at the video monitor a few minutes later and it looked like she had something in her hand....UH OH!

So I take Brynn and set her down (she begins to scream because her meal was just cut short) and I run upstairs (which just after a c section, not so good!). I go into Addie's room and swing open the door, and the smell HITS me like a ton of bricks! I see Addie and she has POOP all down her legs, on her arms, on her sheets, pillow cases, comforter, and binky! UGH! It was everywhere. So I pick her up and strip her down and put her in the tub (again, not easy after a c section) and hose her down with the shower nozzle. I try to get all the poop off her, all the while trying not to gag and listening to Brynn scream!

So then I run and grab my wrap and put Brynn on me so she won't cry so much and then juggle bathing Addie and keeping Brynn's head from bobbing back and forth in my wrap! UGH! Then I have to go and strip the bed, throw the binky away, cause there's just not reason to clean that....so gross!

Needless to say, I got it all cleaned up, but was very sore after wards.

Yeah, no one mentions all the poop you have to deal with as a mommy...if they did, I think we'd all think twice before having kids!

Grace...

“What I need as a mother is grace. God’s grace, that allows me to fail and try again, that allows me to ask for help when I don’t have the wisdom or patience I need, that reminds me we’re not alone in this, and that God loves my daughter even more than I do. And grace from other mothers. I need grace and truth-telling and camaraderie from other moms. I need us to tell the truth about how hard it is, and I need us to help each other, instead of hiding behind the pretense and pressure of perfection.

————-

Let’s think about grace—grace from a God who loves us and values us and picks us up every time we fall, with just exactly the same love and tenderness you feel when you pick up your kids after they have fallen. And the grace we show one another when we drop the comparisons and the catalog images and really walk with one another, on the good days and the bad days. Let’s think about honesty and helping and telling our stories. Let’s give each other a break and a little help and some soft places to land.

If you’re a mom, what you do is nurture and protect and give grace. You do it all the time, and it’s very important, because it reminds us, in daily, tangible ways how God nurtures and protects and gives grace. And maybe today the one who really needs that nurturing and protection and grace is you.”

(S. Niequist)

*******************************************************************

I saw this on another blog and it really spoke to me....

I want to be a grace giver. I want to be the kind of woman and mom that shows my girls what it means to truly have God's grace play out in my life. I have been in need of grace so many times in my life and I want to be the person that gives it back freely in return.

I've failed. I WILL fail again. Yet,I want to pick myself up and try again each time. I have had times in my life where I was not shown grace, and I remember how that feels. I don't want to do that to others. Especially other moms who are struggling each day too.

I also want my children to show me grace as we navigate through life. I will not always be the perfect wife, the perfect mom, the perfect daughter, or the perfect friend. But Christ shows me grace on a daily basis (sometimes minute by minute) and I not only want that from others, I want to be an example of that to others.

So...I'm working on grace....how about you?

Prayer Request

I am writing you with somewhat of a heavy, yet hopeful heart. We are only 4 weeks away from Brynn's due date! All is looking good with her testing as well as mine. (To put you at ease at the start of this). We are on track at this point to try for a VBAC (vaginal delivery after Cesarean). Of course we are ready and open if the doctors tell us at any point that they want to deliver her via c section if that's what best.

The reason I'm writing is to ask that you cover us in prayer. It seems that the consensus right now is that we should expect for Brynn to end up in the NICU because of Peyton and Addison's history of hyper thyroidism when they were born. I have to say that with ALL my heart, I feel angry at the expectation. I know that God is bigger than all of this, and I firmly believe that if it's His will, Brynn can bypass this and come home with us. We want so desperately to leave the hospital with our baby (something we didn't get to do with Peyton or Addie). We want so much for this to be the smoothest delivery and just a miraculous birth! I am writing to ask you to commit us to prayer for the next four weeks. I am asking that you pray that Brynn will be born naturally, without any complications. That she will NOT be born with any thyroid problems and will NOT require the NICU for any reason at all. Please pray that we can have the same bonding experience and birth experience that so many other families are fortunate enough to have. I will not accept defeat before she is even born. We will pray this baby home! I ask that you would help us to do that! If any of you have prayer chains that you are involved with, I would ask you to put our family on them. We cannot have too many people interceding on our behalf!

Thank you all for your support and prayers. We truly appreciate them.

1 John 5:14-15

And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.

Matthew 18:19

Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.

Our little fish

Here is our little fish. She started out on her first day of swim lessons just wanting to put her head in the water and float. She ended like this! Swimming with her arms and feet. We are so proud!!!! All this at just TWO. Where did our baby go? She's such a big girl now!

Update on Baby Brynn and Mommy

It has been a while! I guess pregnancy and a toddler can make time fly!

To be honest, we Blythes are in need of prayer!

To catch you all up, I am now 30 weeks pregnant with Brynn, and she is quite the active baby.

Addie is potty trained now! (PTL) and swimming like a champ after two weeks of lessons! Although she has found her independance and I am in the process of reading Dr. Dobson's Strong Willed Child! Yet she is the joy of my life!

I am living right now in a lot of pain. I hurt my back, back in high school, and it flares up from time to time, but pregnancy just makes it almost unbearable. (This is the first prayer request). It is so hard to be in pain everyday, and try to keep up with housework, shopping, and chasing after Addison. I will say that the pain is taking it's toll on me physically and emotionally. Please lift me up in prayer as I now enter the homestretch of the pregnancy.

As I've written about before, my thyriod tissue has grown back for a second time now. Because of this, throughout this pregnancy, my doctor has been lowering my thyroid medication. As of two weeks ago, he took me off of it completely. I will admit, I had a bit of a melt down, because it brought back a lot of memories of when we lost Peyton. But God is GOOD! I called my OB (who is the sweetest Christian man) and he let me cry and worry and he decided to put me in NST (Non-stress tests) right then ( I wasn't supposed to start for another two or three weeks). A NST is where I go to the hospital twice a week to the Labor and Delivery Floor and they hook me up to a monitor and they monitor Brynn's heart rate. The goal is that her resting heart rate will be somewhere between 120 and 160. This is considered normal. (She's been averaging 140) Peyton's only symptom was an elevated resting heart rate of about 180 to 190. We did these tests with Addison as well. Yes, it's kind of a pain to head to the hospital every Monday and Thursday, but I am blessed with an amazing Mom who watches Addie while I'm there at my appts. I am now in my third week of testing. It has had a calming effect on me because I get to see her on an ultrasound each time as well as be assured her heart rate is normal.

Today I had my testing and her heart rate was at 160. Even though this is "normal", I asked the nurse to talk to my doctor to be sure this wasn't a concern since it seemed to have jumped up. He assured me it was fine, but I will admit, I had some anxiety today. The nurse that was doing the test was talking to me and made a comment "you should expect that this baby will have to spend some time in the NICU too, due to your history". Wow! That hit me! I have had this thought in my mind, that somehow, Brynn's birth would be different. THIS baby would be the baby that I would bring home on the same day I leave the hospital. I haven't let myself believe that Brynn could end up in the NICU because it's not on option I'm letting myself entertain. I realized today that if I want this baby girl to stay out of the NICU, then I'd better be on my knees. And not only me! It could take an army of prayer warriors. I want this baby to be healthy and to come home! I don't want to endure the NICU again, especially with a 2 year old at home who won't take kindly to me being gone all day at the hospital trying to nurse a baby in the NICU!

So I am asking anyone reading this, please commit our family to prayer. Please lift us up! Please pray for complete health for Brynn, as well as wisdom for the doctors and a faithful heart for us to know that God has it all in HIS hands. Also please pray that Brynn's resting heart rate does not go above 160, because if it does, then we might have to deliver early, and then the NICU would be inevitable. We really could use a blanket of prayers from our loved ones. Thank you all!

God is faithful! We know that! We have Addison at home as proof of His faithfulness and promises! We believe that God will also let us bring Brynn home.

My cuddle bug

So when Addie was born, it was clear from the start that she was not a cuddler. She would squirm away when you tried.

Now she always wanted me near her cause she HATES to be alone, but just not cuddled. She's too busy, she can't be bothered.

So I would pray "Lord at some point, let her become a cuddler"...it was just something I longed for!

Now that she's 2,something has changed! All of the sudden she wants to cuddle in bed with us, or on the couch with us. She has started the spontaneous "I love you"s. She grabs our arm and just hugs it. She crawls up everyday and kisses and pats my tummy and says "I love you baby Brynn". It just blesses me so much to see her become such a loving and affectionate little girl. I want to bottle it up and keep it forever!

The Purple Dress

Okay, so I've been there. You know, in Target, shopping, minding my own business, when I see a tired, worn out looking woman and her toddler stroll past me. I glance at the toddler and see that they are wearing some strange mismatched outfit, with their hair a mess, a tiara in their hair, and mismatching shoes. I always used to think to myself, "I will NEVER let my child dress themselves like that". You could see the defeat in the mom's eyes. She had given up the fight! She had no fight left!

So this brings me to the "Purple Dress". The ugly, shiny, purple velvet dress up dress. My daughter has a complete OBSESSION with this dress! She DEMANDS to wear it morning, noon, and night.

I enter her room in the morning when she first wakes up and her first words to me are "Mommy, I play dress up! I want my poo-poo dress (aka purple dress)". I then have to fight with her as I change her diaper and try to get breakfast down her before putting it on her.

I was fighting her, trying to get her to take it off at nap time, but yes, I am defeated. I have given in on this point. I finally said, WHO CARES if she wears it to nap in.

I do try to pick my battles. The purple dress is not allowed on while eatting (because this thing is a pain to clean), not allowed during bathtime (don't think she hasn't tried!), and not allowed out of the house. (Seriously, who do I have all these cute Gymboree clothes, when all they are are covered by this ugly dress up dress??????)

But...let's be honest, I'm tired and pregnant...so if you see me in Target or Trader Joes and Addison is wearing this dreadful purple dress, you'll see the defeat in my eyes. You'll know that I have become that tired, worn down mother who finally just gave in cause she just can't fight a stubborn, headstrong two year old anymore!

Don't judge...

Of course, here is a picture, so you will see it. I know, at first you'll think she looks cute! And she does...but NOT day after day!!!!!!!!!!

Ugh...stab me in the heart!

So as a working mom, you make the decision to do what you feel is best and leave your child for two-five days a week (depending on your job) because you know that even though it's hard, it's the best thing for your family....right now. But let me just tell you, no matter how logical it is to have a job so you can pay your bills, live in your house, and put food on your table, there are very few things WORSE than you child screaming and crying for you as you walk out the door into the working world.

This morning, Addison woke up way too early for her (5:45!!!!). So we brought her into bed and I snuggled a bit with Elmo on in the background with her before I had to drag my booty out of bed to get ready for work. She was okay at first, saying things like "Mommy take a shower", or "Mommy go potty" (she loves to narrate all things I do). When I was done drying my hair, she says from bed "Mommy All Done". I feel like this means we're gonna have a smooth transition this morning. You see, usually when I leave for work, she is still asleep, so it saves the two of us tons of drama when she wakes up and mommy is already gone. No harm, no foul.

So I turn off the lights, get some socks out of the sock drawer, and BOOM, she realizes that I'm about to leave. So she says "Addie go bye bye too!". Of course in that moment my heart sinks. "No baby, Mommy has to go to work, you get to stay with Daddy"! Said in my most amazing voice like I was telling her "No honey, you get to take a bath in chocolate today!". Yeah...she wasn't buying it. She immediately lets out a blood curdling scream and reaches for me. She starts to crawl her way across the bed where I'm sitting putting on my shoes and socks and grabs onto me like we're on the sinking Titanic. Let me tell you, it FELT like we were on that boat! It was so heart wrenching. It took all I had to not burst our in tears and join her sob fest.

I took her in my arms, rocked her and kissed her as she still cried and told her I loved her but that I had to go to work. She held on so tight that after a few minutes, I had to literally pry her hands off me and give her to Justin. Still screaming and with Justin saying "Just GO babe!!!", I backed out of the room saying "I love you I love you I love you"....

Yeah, I KNOW that I need to be a working mom right now, but let me tell you that it SUCKS! My poor girl got her little heart broken today because she wants what all kids want and deserve. A mommy who is with them 24/7 every step of the way. (I know it's not very PC of me to wish that all mommies got to stay home, but oh well, that's just me).

So all you working moms out there...I feel for ya! We've all had mornings like this one, I know. We've all left with our heads hung in guilt and shame for leaving our precious babies. Now I just have to get out of this funk, so that I can do my job today and then rush home to the arms of my sweet baby girl, who wants nothing more in this world, than to be with ME!

A song can touch your heart like nothing else....

Spring is here, flowers are blooming, the weather is warming up, and the end of the school year is finally in sight! Addison will be two in less than two months, and the pregnancy is going great!



We're super busy in life right now it seems. Too busy to sit and even think about what is ahead of us. I feel like I'm just trying to get through each week, trying to check off my mental "to do" list, feeling like there just aren't enough hours in the day. I find it so hard to fit in my quiet time with the Lord. Being the mom of a toddler, it seems like that is just a luxury! I find that my main time with God lately is in the car, as I listen to my Christian music and sit and pray while I drive.



On my way to work today, I popped in a new CD I bought weeks ago, that I'm just finally getting around to opening and listening to. I blogged about Jana Alayra a while back, about how awesome her story and children's music is.



(Addie knows all her songs now and it blesses me beyond words to hear her little voice singing the words and doing her best to copy Jana's motions to each song...My favorite is when she sings "Nuffin, Nuffin, absoutee Nuffin" with her two little fingers up and shaking in a "no" motion...PRICELESS)



So on my way to work, I wasn't expecting anything other than my usual drive, trying to pray and give my day to the Lord. This particular CD isn't a children's CD, it's written for adults. I blogged about how she lost her little girl in a car accident, and this CD has a song on it that she wrote about her daughter. Well, of course I'm listening to it, and all of the sudden, tears are streaming down my face. It's, to say the least, amazing! It just spoke to my heart and blessed me, so I want to share the lyrics with you! I will bold the one line that touched me more than any other line in the song. I hope you enjoy what it says. Even if you've never lost a child, it helps you to see into the heart of a mom who has. (sorry if it makes you cry :)



Every Minute that I Breathe (Lynnie's Song) by Jana Alayra


Photos on the mantle
I won't change
For they still remind me
of a day
You filled our hearts
with laughter and your smile
How we loved you...
for awhile


The day came in the blinking of an eye
When suddenly we had to say goodbye
As you were soaring homeward through the blue
Part of me went right along with you


Every time I hear you in my mind
Though my heart weeps, my soul takes flight
To the place where you are
Somewhere far beyond the farthest star
Now every minute that I breathe
You live what I believe

You gave me so much more than joy
In you I saw a reason for each morn'
In a world unwinding as it spun
Holding you would make me still again
Many say your days with us were too few
But they were numbered by the Lord for you
A message of your life remains through time
Jesus gave you everlasting life

Every time I hear you in my mind
Though my heart weeps, my soul takes flight
To the place where you are
Somewhere far beyond the farthest star
New every minute that I breathe
You live what I believe
Every timeI see you dancing through my mind
Though I long to hold you, my soul takes flight
To the place where you live
To watch you sing and dance, what would I give
Now every minute that I breath
You live what I believe

One day I will see Jesus come for me
No one knows the hour He will come
I will fall at His feet for all He's done for me
Then straight into your arms I'll run...

Baby #3!!

Some of you know this...some of you don't. :)

So, my last post about this subject I told you that the doctors told us that we couldn't get pregnant due to my hormone levels, and that we SHOULDN'T get pregnant...

So when I was waking up hungry in the mornings and feeling extremely tired, I decided to take a pregnancy test, on a whim. I didn't even tell Justin I was doing it, because I knew it would be negative....

This is what I saw:



So after I picked my jaw up off the ground, I walked in and told Justin the news. He was shocked and I think his response was "No you're not!". Yeah, took a bit for us to process. We really had given it to the Lord and were fine with waiting another year, as per doctors requests.

We freaked out a bit, got on the phone with the doctors immediately, and got the ball rolling with figuring out what this meant for us.

Here is our jist of what the doctors have decided (after ALL of them congratulated us and NONE of them made us feel bad for this happening sooner than planned). We will take my blood levels every 4 weeks in order to check my thyroid levels to be sure that I don't get too high. Since we thought we were going to do radiation on the regrowth in my neck, that is now put on hold until after the baby is born. I am already being seen by the same perinatologist that was on my case with Addison. I will be seen by her every three to four weeks. Then starting again at 30 weeks I will go twice a week for heart monitoring and ultrasounds to be checked. I am feeling very confident with my care, and I feel like all hands are on deck.

So, here is our latest ultrasound pic (me holding it and taking a pic cause I don't have a scanner at home)



I am now 12 weeks, and am due on September 23. We are super excited and hope we can count on all your prayers as we go through this, yet again, scary yet amazing journey.

What gift did HE give me?

It's been awhile since I've sat down to put my heart onto the page. I guess I feel sometimes like I should only write when something seems "worthy" to be written about. That's my own hang up (I have lots of them). But today I was blessed and wanted to share...

I was at MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) and we had a special speaker Jana Alayra. She was AMAZING to say the least. She is a singer/song writer based in Orange County and mainly does children's christian music, but also has some CDs for adults. Anyway, she was giving her testimony, and there wasn't a dry eye in the house. I of course struggled and cried a bit harder, due to her story. Bless her heart, she lost her daughter at age 4 in a car accident where she was driving. (Ugh, kick me in the gut with that one). She went on to explain how Christ was with her in this experience and loss. How she felt that He always gives us a "gift" when we experience such tragedy. (I'm not doing her story justice, I'm sorry).

Well, all the memories of Peyton were flooding back to me as she was talking. See, usually I do a pretty good about keeping those at bay. I sort of have a script that I'm used to saying when I share with people about the loss of our boy. It's kind of like I go on auto pilot and don't let myself "feel" the story as I tell it. It's self preservation I guess. There's no way I could live in "that painful place" everyday. I wouldn't be able to put one foot in front of the other. So we sort of lock those parts away, and the rawness of it all. Oh course today that door flew open and I couldn't keep the tears from falling. It's this way whenever I meet another mom who's lost a child. I get their heart and they get mine.

So when she said that God gave her the gift of knowing, really knowing, that Christ was with her through it and had a plan, I thought "What was my gift Lord?" I often look back on how I handled our loss and wonder, "did I do it right?" There's not a manuel. There's not a one size fits all grief outfit to put on.

Lord, did I do what you wanted? Did I learn what you wanted me to learn? What was my gift?

I felt like right then, He spoke to me. He showed me my gift that He gave to me. I truly believe that God gave me the gift of clarity when I shouldn't have had it. He showed me that 75% of marriages crumble and die of divorce after the loss of a child. He showed me that I didn't want to be in that percent. That we needed counseling to get through this. He showed me that I needed to take the time to heal myself and our marriage and to do the hard work it involved (even if others didn't get it) so that I could become whole again. So I could be the wife and mom God meant for me to be for my future kids. He showed me that I could go down the path of pain and bitterness, or I could go down the path of painful healing. I just always KNEW that I needed to get better. I couldn't bury my head in the sand. Looking back, that was my gift. The Heavenly Father knew I needed that gift, and met me right where I was and walked each one of those heartbreaking days with me. Growing me, stretching me, molding me. And He gave me the promise that this is not permanent. That Peyton is with Him and just waiting for me to join them! How great is that? My goodbye was not a forever goodbye, it was more like a see you soon. Another gift....

When the world gives you more than you think you could ever manage or handle...look for HIS gifts. They're there, just waiting for us to open them.

Fun with Friends

We spent the day with our friends at the park and for lunch. Addie LOVES to play with "Gabey Hannah" said like it's one word. Gabe and Hannah are my good friend Kim's twins. They're about 6 months older than Addison and for the most part they all play really well together.

Hannah is quite the little talker and helper. She's sort of the ring leader, with Addie wanting to do whatever she is doing. Here she was running from the camera and I got her right as she struck a little DIVA pose.



Gabe, being ALL boy, is of course the resident car/truck guy stopping whenever he sees one go by.



Then there's Addie who always wants to color, and by that I mean eat the crayons and chalk. She is also the one "walking around" the park, and not actually playing on much of the equipment. This picture is a rarity.



So we spent the day first at the new park by the Plunge in Brea, and then off we went to get our FREE Chick Fil A meal. Kim had never been there and was shocked at how crowded it was...but come on, Biola kids hear FREE and they come in droves. So we ended up meeting Daddy there too and we all ate our free chicken fingers and they gave the kids some balloons.



Hannah decided she didn't want one (as you can tell in the picture), until Addie lost one in the air and we gave her Hannah's and then of course she wanted it back! Oh the joys of "toddlerhood". All in all, it was a great day with friends.

Raisins

So my cute baby (although not such a baby anymore) was snacking last night as we waited for Justin to get home so we could meet the Blairs for dinner. In her snack cup was a random assortment of goldfish, raisins, and everything pretzles( the kind with everything on them for seasoning). Anyway so she walks over to me and in her cute voice says " hee oo go mommy" and wants me to eat the raisin she is offering me with her chubby little hand. I take it and pretend to put it in my mouth. I mean sure rains are good in cookies and cereal but I have never liked them by themselves. Well I am not a good pretender cause she sees right through me and starts whinning cause she wants me to really eat the darn thing. So being the loving mom that I try to be, I quickly pop the raisin into my mouth. I think about swallowing it but then decide to chew. (I know you're thinking...it's a raisin!!!! What's the big deal. But it was a mental thing for me).

So here's the lesson. I liked it!! I liked a raisin all by itself. It took me until the ripe old age of 32 to figure this out!! It made me think of God. How many times does He outstretch His hand to us with a perfectly good blessing and we turn our noses up to it cause in our heads we've made a decision NOT to like it. If we would just let our guards down and try something new the Father is asking us we might be really surprised.

Have you said no to God latey when you really should have taken a step of faith and said yes??

Blessings not lost on me

Today is a good day. Today is a blessed day. I love that today God's many blessings aren't lost on me.

Today God blesses me with:

Communion. I love communion and I always feel closer to Him when I take it.

Friends. He blesses me with some sweet new friends who let me sit with them at church (since Justin has to leave after our fellowship class to go to work). Friends who invited Addison and me to lunch after church, and then they all helped me to wrangle her and keep her entertained being that I was again without my spouse. Friends who asked about Peyton and let me share my story of my sweet baby boy without making me feel like I was making them uncomfortable. Friends who made me feel loved and a part of something.

Rocking my girl to sleep. Whenever she goes down late she ends up needing some help with it. I feel like this is a precious gift that God has given to me because I am all too aware that soon she won't want to sit on my lap and fall asleep in my arms. And this is what I dreamed about after Peyton died so I want to be aware enough to cherish these moments before they slip through my fingers.

Justin gets off work at 5. For most wives this is normal. For me it's the exception. He usually doesn't get home from work until after 7. So it's so nice on Sundays that he gets home two hours earlier than normal.

And the Colts. Justin would be upset if I didn't add that the Colts going to the super bowl wasn't a blessing. At leas in the Blythe household.

So thanks Lord for helping me to see some of the many ways you've chosen to bless me today.

I hope you can find some ways He's blessed you today.

Ugh

So now the doctor called back and after talking to the head of nuclear medicine at PIH, they've decided that they want to do a fine needle biopsy of the mass before the scan. These are NOT fun. I had one last time and it was pretty painful. This mass is pretty far in my neck so I'm sure this one will also be pretty painful. HELLO! A HUGE needle being put into your neck. Talk about wanting to scream! So please pray, now this is our next step and we're waiting for the okay from insurance.

Rainy Days

You've got to love how we here in So. Cal have no idea what to do with ourselves when it rains. I think kids have a pretty good idea. This is really Addie's first rain storm where she's been aware that it's raining and she just can't get enough of it! It's like it's built into her to know that rain is sent by God to us to stop and listen to it, watch it, and of course PLAY IN IT! I just love it! Here are some pics and videos of Addison playing in the rain!

and the conclusion...Daddy is crazy!!!

Prayer is a mighty thing if you ask me!

Well let's start off with saying that God is good! The older I get the more I see His work weaving in and out of every part of my life.

So we headed out in "Storm Twenty-Ten" as the news is calling it (LOL, so lame that So Cal has to stop everything for heavy rain) to head to the doctor. After waiting what felt like forever, with my leg shaking and my heart racing, we finally were called in to wait some more in our room. Justin, being the ADD guy that he is, had his itouch with him, so he was having me play games on it to keep my mind off how nervous I was to get these results.

The doctor walked in and went through an overview of what happened at our last appt. and then started to look at the 18 different blood tests he had ordered.

The amazing piece of news that we got was that every test regarding my pituitary gland came back normal!!! "Wait, I thought I had some of these last time at ZERO? What happened??" I asked. He said he didn't know, it could be lab error. Lab error? I don't think so! HELLO, it was the Lord and I just know it. I have had so many prayer warriors go before me regarding this and now all of the sudden a month later, my levels for this gland in my brain are fine?! I'm healed?!

Praise God!

Again, He's showing me so many things about prayer right now in my life, it's amazing. I feel blessed that right now He's chosen to show me just how mighty prayer can be. He's showing me that HE is in my life, for the big and the little things. It just continues to strengthen my faith.

So, no MRI, no further testing, my brain is fine!

Now onto what we do need to tackle. There is still the matter of the two in. long tumor in my neck that shouldn't be there. I guess it's even bigger than a normal thyroid gland would be. So, our plan of attack is to have a thyroid uptake scan done. It's a pretty non invasive test, but it does have a drawback. I have to go off my meds for almost a month. What that means is that my body is going to go into major HYPO thyroid mode. I will become pretty emotional, very lethargic, lose energy, be very cold, and pretty much just run like someone has hit the slow motion button on my body. I am not looking forward to it. It will then take a few weeks once I go back on my meds to get back to normal. So we're waiting for the test to be approved by my HMO and then to be scheduled. We're praying ( and asking all you prayer warriors that I have) that this can all be done in a month's time. If we do find that the mass in my neck is thyroid tissue, then I will take the radioactive iodine pill and it will work for 6 months to kill the tissue. This means, no getting pregnant during that time because it would then attack the new baby's thyroid. So, we're gonna have to put on hold those plans for about 9 months total probably, but like I said, GOD IS GOOD! We're okay with it. It just means we get to give Addison more of our one on one time.

He knows best.

So please keep us in your prayers and I'll let you know once I get my uptake test scheduled. Thanks to all of you who care so much!!!

A lesson for both of us!

So I was super excited on Wednesday when Justin and I were getting ready to take Addison to her very first art class. She takes classes at La Mirada Community Center with my mom on Thursdays and has this teacher that she just LOVES. Every day she asks me..."Gina?". And everyday I have to say "Gina bye-bye". She repeats me to show her resolve to the sad fact and waits again for the next day in hopes that the answer will be "Yes, we're going to see Gina". Which for me is never because my mom takes her on Thursdays while I'm at work.

So I've been wanting to take her to a class by the famous "Gina" and one opened up on Wednesdays. Since either both of us or just Justin always has her on Wednesdays I thought this would be perfect. It's called "Edible Art Class". So fun! You have to be 18 months old or older, so she just made the mark, coming in at 19 months now (man, she's so grown up). So we signed her up and were excited to start our 6 week course.

When I got her ready that morning, I had the same thought that most mommies have when dressing their little girls. "She needs to be the cutest one in the class!" I know, some of you moms already know where this is headed....So I got one of her new cute Gymboree shirts out of the closet that my mom and dad had given her for Christmas, and took the tags off (no, I don't pre wash, I know I'm a horrible mom) and put it on her. Got her cute bow in her hair and off the three of us went.

So we get there and in my head I'm thinking, I wonder if they'll provide bibs for the kids since we'll be working with food. Well.....Miss Gina, the one and only, starts by passing out glue and markers! Glue and markers?? Hello! Where's the food? She then proceeds to walk the children through three art projects that included glue, markers, 8 different colors of paint (no, not the water based kind) and encouraged all of them to get their hands in it and get messy! Well....there went the cute outfit! Addie was covered! It was everywhere, her shirt, her face, her hair....even on Mommy and Daddy cause she would grab at us with it everywhere. This is what her shirt looked like when we got home...





So we both learned a lesson that day. She learned all the fun things you can do with glue and paint, and Mom learned that you don't wear Gymboree to an art class. I guess she'll have the cutest "art shirt" now that she'll wear each time we go back. Here is what she made that day though:




Oh yeah, the edible part of the class? A cup of fruit loops at the end that they could make into patterns or pictures before eating. Cute! But not what I had thought it would be. Oh well, you live and learn.

Trying to Trust God in this.

So I was reading my new favorite blog, by Beth Moore today and tears started to stream down my face. She has recently had a health scare, and I too am in the midst of a health scare. It was comforting to read about her story and struggle and to see how the Lord delivered her from a horrible outcome. I realized though, that I have been faithful in worrying about this, in being anxious about it, but not as faithful to pray about it. I go into to get blood work back from the doctor on Tuesday and my heart is anxious. Yet I am trying to STILL learn to rest in God during anything like this. To know that we are all called to a purpose and plan. We are all called to walk down a different path, and whatever my path may be, the Lord will be faithful to make it work together for good. To work together for His glory.


So this is my verse I'm praying for Tuesdays appt. Join me in this prayer if you want....

Let us then approach his throne of grace with confidence, so that we many receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16